Movies That Hate You: Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back

Although the Rebellion has destroyed the Galactic Empire’s new Space Station, the Imperial Fleet manages to find the Rebel base on Yavin and drives the Rebels out of hiding.  Scattered throughout the Universe, Luke Skywalker, new hero of the Rebels, finds Hoth VI, a world of harsh cold and snow, for the Rebels to rest and rearm.  Darth Vader, now obsessed with finding Luke Skywalker, orders the Imperial Fleet to search the Galaxy for them.

A probe sends a message fragment on Hoth VI, which is noticed by Captain Piett.  Despite objections by Admiral Ozell, Darth Vader orders his fleet to head for Hoth VI and attack the Rebellion.  As the Rebels work out how to escape, Ozell’s move to take the Rebels by surprise fails, and he is killed by Vader for his incompetence.  General Veers takes a large task force down to the surface, and a battle ensues.  Despite heavy losses, the Empire emerges victorious, but takes no prisoners and all of Vader’s primary targets escape.

While Luke Skywalker breaks away from the Rebels to head for Dagobah, Han Solo and Leia Organa are heavily pursued by the Empire.  Complicating matters is the fact that the hyperdrive aboard the Millennium Falcon no longer functions, so Han Solo and Chewbacca fly into a nearby asteroid field and manage to evade their pursuers for a while.

Luke arrives at Dagobah, but crash lands on the planet and finds a small creature who spends more time playing around with him than being of any help, although this creature knows things about Luke’s family.  When Luke gets irritated, the creature reveals that he is the Jedi Master Yoda, and tells Luke that he is not ready to train.  When Luke relents, Yoda attempts to teach him about the dangers of the Dark Side of the Force, with mixed results.

While Han Solo and Leia get closer to each other in the middle of repairing the ship, Darth Vader orders his ships to search the field.  Eventually, the Millennium Falcon is forced out of the asteroid it landed on by the giant space creature it had unwittingly used as a cave to land in.  The Empire’s ships find the Falcon once more, and pursues relentlessly.  A landing trick by Han Solo allows the Falcon to “hide” on one of the Empire’s capital ships – a maneuver that costs its Captain his life when he is confronted by Darth Vader.

The Empire soon deploys its ships in a search patterns to find the Falcon, and Han hides his ship in the garbage dumped by the Empire.  Running out of options, he finds that he can make his way to Bespin, a planet run by Lando Calrissian, an old friend of his.  Unfortunately, Han is followed by Bobba Fett, a bounty hunter.

Luke continues his training, but his own ship sinks beneath the swamp.  Yoda uses this as a teaching moment, and Luke attempts to use the Force to lift his ship out of the bog.  Unable to do so in the first attempt, Luke gives up and leaves.  Yoda uses the Force to lift the ship out of the swamp and sets it down on solid land.  Luke expresses his disbelief and Yoda chastises him for it.  Finally convinced of the power of the Force, Luke enthusiastically continues his training.

Han Solo arrives at Bespin to a hostile reception by its security forces.  Eventually he is confronted by Lando Calrissian, who is eager to catch up on old times.  Leia is suspiscious of him, and C3PO ends up missing…until he is found by Chewbacca in a junk pile – in pieces.  Leia’s fears seem validated when Lando invites them to dinner and Darth Vader appears with a battallion of Stormtroopers.

Luke, continuing his training in the ways of the Force, has a vision of his friends being tortured.  Desperate to help them, he abandons his training and rushes off to Bespin.  Vader tortures Han Solo and Chewbacca, and Lando has a falling out with Han.  Vader makes a deal with Bobba Fett and has Han Solo frozen in Carbonite.  Luke Skywalker lands on Bespin’s Cloud City and Vader sets a trap.

Lando, having had all of his promises broken by Darth Vader, decides to escape.  Although initially rebuffed by Leia and Chewbacca, they team up and try to rescue Han.  They failed to reach him in time, but they rush back to the Falcon to escape.  Lando orders the evacuation of all of people within the Cloud City.

Luke tries to find his friends in the city, but finds only Darth Vader.  They have a lightsaber duel, where Vader’s skills are obviously superior to Luke’s.  However, Luke does manage to score a surprising hit on Vader, where the only thing that kept Vader from losing his arm was his armored cloak.  In retaliation, Vader cuts off Luke Skywalker’s right hand.  As Luke hangs over the precipice, Vader gives him a relevation that shakes Luke to the core:  Vader is Luke’s father.

Given the choice to join his father or die, Luke jumps off the ledge.  He is sucked into a garbage chute and ejected to the bottom of the city itself.  Hanging over the side, holding on for dear life, he uses the Force to call out to Leia.  Hearing his call, she directs the Falcon to him.  After he is caught by Lando, the Falcon takes off and heads for space.  Waiting for them, however, is Vader’s personal ship, a Super Star Destroyer.  Once again, however, the hyperdrive does not work.

R2D2, in the meantime, remembers that the Bespin City Computer told him that the Empire shut the Hyperdrive off and goes to turn the switch back to ON.  After doing so, the Falcon flies into hyperspace.

At the Rebel’s rendesvous point, Luke is given a mechanical hand, and Lando and Chewbacca embark on a rescue mission to save Han Solo from Bobba Fett and his master, Jabba the Hutt.

Review and Analysis:

The Empire Strikes Back is the quintessential Movie That Hates You.  Because when you begin to analyze this movie from the view of Common Sense, the WHOLE movie falls apart.

The Pointy-Helmet Boss:

I'll give you a vague order. When you follow it, I'll choke you to death and tell your successor how I really wanted the job to be done.

Darth Vader has a habit of giving his subordinates orders where it is expected of them to have Betazoid levels of Telepathy to interpret what he really wants.  He tells his fleet commander to set course the Hoth System to confront the Rebels.  It is not known how long the trip takes, but it is apparent that he had a plan of action on what to do when the ships actually arrive at Hoth VI.

But he chooses not to inform his Fleet Commander of these plans at all. In fact, Vader does nothing regarding the invasion of Hoth until AFTER the fleet had made Planetfall. When Ozell failed to read Vader’s mind about his intentions, Vader Force-chokes Ozell, killing him.  But then he tells his new Fleet Commander what he wanted to have done in terms of invasion and fleet deployment.

Vader would do this once more with Captain Needa of the Avenger. Remember that no one knows that the Falcon’s hyperdrive has a bad fuel pump yet, so the Falcon could have jumped (which is was Piett suggests shortly after Needa is choked out).  But Vader killed Needa anyhow.

Stupid Empire, Even Dumber Rebels:

The Imperial Forces that arrived on Hoth VI made the Planetary shield useless by landing outside of the shield’s operational zone.  And what do they send to attack the Rebellion on an ice planet?

Rated Top Speed: 10mph.

Slow moving legged Elephant Slugs.

Apparently, the Empire doesn’t have anything remotely available to call in an airstrike.  The Empire doesn’t believe in paratroopers, either.

Or, land closer to the Rebel base if their intention was to capture the personnel.

But this pales in comparison to what the Rebels use to defend their base camp with:

You Won't See These Deployed in Any Other Movie

Flying snowmobiles with harpoon guns.

Maybe next time the Rebellion decides to hide out on a planet, it will be somewhere the Empire can’t deploy slow-moving Elephant Slugs to attack them with.

Darth, the Pointy Helmet Boss, Part II:

When Darth Vader lands on Bespin, he uses his troops to threaten Lando Calrissian and his City to force them to cooperate to capture Han Solo and Leia Organa.

When Han and Leia land on Bespin, he uses his troops to capture Han Solo and Leia Organa to bait Luke Skywalker into landing on Bespin.  And he does this by…torturing Luke’s friends.  Maybe he planned to have one of them tell Vader where Luke is.  Or maybe he believed that Luke’s Force Powers would kick in to let him see into the Future.

This works the first two times when capturing people. But leave it to Force Users to abandon something that works.

When Luke lands on Bespin, Darth…leads him to some chamber where the two of them swing light sticks and banter about the Force.  Darth throws lots of junk around at him, and them tells him that Luke is his son.

He also orders his Fleet Commander to deactivate the hyperdrive on the one craft that could be used by the Rebels to escape…instead of flying in with an Imperial Cop Car and towing it away.  Or setting charges and blowing the ship to pieces.  Or, if he wanted to be “devious,” removing components of the hyperdrive (or the thrusters), rendering the ship inoperable.  But he does none of these things.

And once again, in the end, despite the Rebels’ setbacks, Darth leaves Bespin like he did Hoth VI:  Empty-handed.

Lando Calrissian, the Smartest Man in the Star Wars Universe:

And why do I bestow the title onto him?

First, Darth Vader brings in a garrison on troops onto Cloud City.  His reputation has already made it clear that he has no compunction whatsoever of murdering innocents to get what he wants.  Lando, already aware of this, fashions a deal that would keep all parties alive, most of all his friend Han Solo.  Even if Darth Vader had no intention of keeping any part of the bargain whatsoever, Lando did the smart play.

If anyone wants to argue about betrayal, look at the actions of Leia Organa in contrast.  She “held out” until the bitter end.  And what did it get her?

Ground Zero Alderaan. See also: Episode 23 of any 26-Episode Japanese Animated Series.

One planet and ALL OF ITS INHABITANTS completely destroyed.  This includes the man who took her in as his own daughter. The family that raised her.  The friends, co-workers, teachers, fellow students, acquaintences, complete strangers, and so on.


And that’s heroic?

Second, let’s assume that, somehow, Lando would have been able to tell Han and Leia that Darth Vader was there, waiting to spring a trap.  Where would they go?

Their ship’s hyperdrive is still out of commission.

Darth Vader's Personal Cop Car.

This is waiting for them in far orbit around the planet.

The biggest "Hero" of this movie: Kenny Baker.

This robot, who apparently has a vast intelligence network at its disposal, was also not anywhere them.  And with Chewbacca and Lando unable to diagnose a turbo-based motor, this would have been a short trip.

And they would still be in the hands of the Empire.

Third, it was also clear that Lando had a backup plan in case something like this happened.  How else could he have his Security force take the Stormtroopers prisoner?

General Veers, The Only Imperial Commander Ever to Win a Battle in “Star Wars”:

General Veers doing what no Imperial Commander has done ever: Win.

With the slowest armored division ever assembled, he managed to destroy the Rebel base.

Irrational Princess, Part 725.1:

Knowing that time is of the essence to rescue Han Solo, having been freed by Lando Calrissian, Leia repays him by…

Leia and Chewbacca proving that they don't think beyond the 2 inches in front of their noses. Is it any wonder how Darth Sidious was able to take over the Republic?

Having the Man-Ape choke out the only person who knows where Han is and how to get to him quickly.  When they finally release Lando, Leia and Chewbacca run off, although it is clear by the next scene that they have no idea where the East Platform is or how to get to it.  When they get it in their heads that perhaps having Lando lead the way is probably a good idea, they reach the platform just in time to watch Bobba Fett leave Bespin to get his paycheck.

Why the Big Secret?

At some point, someone’s going to have to figure out why Luke’s step-aunt and step-uncle, Luke’s first Jedi teacher, and Luke’s second teacher never got around to telling him that the most feared and loathed man in the universe is actually his own father.

Romance in Star Wars:

The space pirate gets cranky because the former princess of blown-up world won’t “admit” to having romantic feelings about him.  He then sneaks a grope when the giant space worm has a bout of indigestion.  Space Pirate then gets to “first base” before being interrupted by a droid older than the both of them…combined.  Princess of Blown-Up world finally gives in when her father Darth Vader freezes him for Boba Fett.


The Galactic Empire as run by Darth Vader is no real threat.  Darth spends far too much of his time berating his own people, when he’s not choking them to death for not reading his thoughts.  While he chastises his commanders for not being able to capture the Rebels, Darth’s track record is also an atrocity.  They choose landing sites where the Rebels will have plenty of time to escape, and the machines they choose to attack with are slower than loaded down Hondas.

The Jedi are run by a small green Muppet and a ghost.  The training program involves lots of running, jumping, doing handstands while lifting rocks with your mind.  They fail to warn him about Dark Force Lightning, Dark Force Choking, and do very little to improve his lightsaber skills, despite the fact that he would need this when facing Vader and the Emperor.

Oh, and the Skywalker family trainwreck leaves the station in this movie.

The Empire strikes back?  More like the Empire Strikes Out.

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15 Responses to Movies That Hate You: Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back

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  2. Eric S says:

    You make three good points in you analysis. 1. regarding the imperials’ landing site/means of attacking the rebel base 2. The imperials not destroying the Falcon and 3. Obi-Wan and Yoda neglecting to warn Luke about force lightning (which is in the next film, anyway). The rest of your argument is faulty. I will address your points one a time.

    1. Being a high-ranking Imperial admiral, Ozell should know not to bring the imperial fleet out of hyperspace within range of rebel sensors. Similarly, with squadrons of Tie Fighters and Star Destroyers at his disposal, Captain Piet should be able to capture one small vessel without a hyperdrive. Even if these mistakes don’t warrant execution, Darth Vader is not exactly concerned with human life. From his amoral perspective, incompetent commanders are expendable and he is helping the Empire by putting them out of commission. The whole point of having subordinates is so that you don’t have to micromanage. Plus, executions add to his reputation as a fearsome, merciless figure who will not hesitate to snuff out a life at a moment’s notice. Remember Tarkin’s comment in A New Hope About ruling by fear?

    2. Those who are force-sensitive can feel disturbances in the force; every Star Wars film provides examples of this. Being a Sith and former Jedi, Vader knows that Luke will sense his friends’ suffering. Hence, Han’s comment after being tortured: “he didn’t even ask me any questions.”

    3. It is true that Lando’s actions are perfectly rational given his responsibilities as the administrator of Cloud City, even if they are morally questionable. His mistake is not anticipating Vader’s double-cross. Leia’s decision not to save her planet in “A New Hope” is the epitome of heroic. Remember that she does not in fact give away the location of the current rebel base on Yavin, instead giving the location of one on another planet that has been abandoned. The Rebel Allience is the only means of resistance against The Empire, and it is commendable that Leia puts her personal feelings aside for a noble. Remember that Star Wars takes place in a galaxy of trillions, perhaps more. Sacrificing one’s own planet to save many is the essence of heroism. It is what her adoptive father, one of the founders of the Rebel Alliance, would want.

    4. It is perhaps a bit too convenient that R2-D2 is able to fix the hyperdrive where other failed, but he is a droid with certain built in capabilities that humans don’t have, so it technically makes sense. Perhaps it would have been more plausible if Lando’s men had secretly fixed it while it was still grounded. For the sake of the plot, there was no reason the hyperdrive had to be still broken. Nevertheless, this oversight is not too significant in the grand scheme of the film.

    6. As the administrator of Cloud City, Lando could have easily warned the heroes and provided them passage off world.

    5. Leah doesn’t “have” Chewbacca choke Lando. He does that of his own accord. And she understandably tolerates it for a few seconds seeing as Lando just betrayed her and her friends. It would have been irrational if she allowed Chewbacca to murder Lando, but instead she calls him off, knowing that he is their only way out. I fail to see your problem with this scene.

    7. Lando’s “back up plan” hardly required careful planning. All he needed to do was set the prisoners free and hold a few stormtroopers and gunpoint.

    6. Obi-Wan and Yoda didn’t tell Luke about his parentage because they were afraid knowing the truth would interfere with his training and render him unable to fulfill his destiny of confronting Vader. This is all explained in “Return of the Jedi.”

    7. Han and Leia’s romance is developed quite well over the course of the film. You can see the attraction between them arguably in “A New Hope” and certainly in “Empire Strikes Back,” despite Leia’s denial, and the scene aboard the Falcon in the stomach of the space slug clearly establishes their feelings for each other.

    8. We only see a small amount of Luke’s training, which is in fact necessary; Luke’s failure to lift the X-Wing out of the water means that he must improve his telekinesis, to “unlearn what he has learned,” using Yoda’s words. A Jedi must also have stamina. In the first film, we see Luke practicing with his lightsaber. A Jedi must also learn the philosophical and moral lessons necessary to avoid turning to the dark side. This is what Yoda and Obi-Wan mean when they say he requires more training. His dueling can improve only when he learns to channel the force properly; no amount of sparring can teach him that. When explaining the force in “A New Hope,” Obi-Wan explains that in a sense you must allow the force to flow through you and even partially guide your movements. Notice that without any further lightsaber training (besides experience using the force), Luke is able to defeat Vader in “Return of the Jedi.”

    • Heavy Armor says:


      Thanks for stopping by.

      1. This is a case of trying to provide plausibility for Vader to force choke a fleet commander. The scene “looks cool,” but tactically does not make too much sense. If you listen to General Veers before Vader cuts him off, it becomes clear that Ozell tried this tactic before – and it apparently worked before. Ozell may have intended to bring the fleet out of hyperspace that close to bomb the planet from orbit – and prevent the Rebellion from escaping in short order. However, Vader kills Ozell and orders Diett to land the slowest armored division possible, without air support, and deploys the fleet in such a manner that an orbital attack on the planet would be impossible. The shield that the Rebels used only covered a portion of the planet, and Vader doesn’t even bother to use his TIE bombers. It also does not explain why Vader kills Needa, either.

      2. If this is the case, then why does the Most Powerful Jedi/Sith Ever fail to sense his own daughter’s force potential?

      3. Lando’s actions are morally questionable? Congratulations, you’ve proven a point that I have made time-and-time again: The premise of Faceless Victims. Meaning that the lives of the people we don’t see onscreen but are affected by decisions of the characters are unimportant. We are supposed to feel for the Princess, Luke, Han, and the Rebellion. For “Leia’s Heroism”; at least 100,000,000 Alderaanians had to die. And Lucas’s retcon means that Leia is not an Alderanaanian herself. They no longer exist. And all because of Leia’s stupidity and recalcitrance. Remember, Leia dumps the plans on Tatooine in the hopes of R2D2 and C3PO managing to get to Obi-Wan without incident. Just as you accuse Lando of being able to “warn” the heroes and not doing so (except you don’t offer to explain how – nor do you explain how Lando would get them past Vader’s personal Cop Car – The Executor), Leia should have bluffed Dantooine early on, which would have provided more time for Threepio and R2 to accomplish the objective. But…she resisted to the bitter end. Now her adoptive home planet met the same fate as Krypton. Especially given that Tarkin intended on popping in to the system, going straight to the planet and blowing it to smithereens. He only sent scout ships because the planet was too far a target from Alderaan, which would not have been the case if Leia provided a false location first. And if you’re unsure about this assertion, look at his actions at the planet Yavin. If the Falcon’s tracking device had been planted at an abandoned Rebel Base, it’s doubtful Tarkin would have given it second thought before blowing the planet to bits.

      Lando, on the other hand, manages to save just about everyone on the Cloud City of Bespin.

      Only in science fiction do we call the woman who kills her adoptive home planet heroic and the guy who saved the lives of his people a traitor.

      4. You may want to watch the movie again. The Hyperdrive was damaged by the Empire as the Falcon left Hoth, possibly during the ground battle as the Falcon was looking to take off. Lando’s men repaired the Hyperdrive, but the Empire “deactivated” the hyperdrive after they captured Han, Leia, and Chewbacca.

      5. If you want to get full-bore technical, I called Leia out here because she makes no move to stop or dissuade Chewbacca from choking Lando…at all. When he tells her that she can get her Space Pirate back, she runs off, with no clue as to which way she needs to go. As I stated in my review, she and Chewbacca think but 2 inches in front of the faces, and their behavior indicates that. Let’s say, for the sake of argument, that Lando somehow resists Vader in the same way that Leia did. Would it be unreasonable to assume that Vader would have probably killed Lando and a large number of Cloud City inhabitants? Especially given how the Empire has operated up until now? Then this would mean that Han, Leia, and Chewbacca would have landed in an Imperial trap with no means of escape…at all.

      6. Do you know why Lando told his Security Chief to “keep it quiet”? Because he knew that there were more Imperial Troops in his city. In other words, Lando had something like this in mind from the beginning, where he could effectively undermine the Empire…once he could persuade Vader to leave. This is why he strenuously objected to Vader’s altered bargain.

      7. Here’s the problem with this assertion of NO ONE (his step-aunt/step uncle, his mentor, his mentor’s mentor) telling Luke that Anakin/Vader is Luke’s father: It lacks common sense. I stated this earlier: The original story that Lucas penned was that Anakin and Vader were two different people. Owen and Anakin were raised on the farm, but Anakin wanted adventures in space and had the skills to get involved. Vader’s conversation with the Emperor in ESB also indicated that Vader and Anakin were two different people. The SE version retcons this. But, ANH still has Owen’s conversation with Luke about Anakin and Obi-Wan. Because originally, Obi-Wan goes into hiding and Anakin is reported dead. Also, when Obi-Wan tries to prevent Luke from leaving Dagobah, he tells Luke that he does not want to lose him like he lost Vader. This tells me more that Vader was a Jedi – even though Darth Vader was a christening by Palpatine. [Thus, how can Obi-Wan lose a Sith?] Also, Leia was not Luke’s sister in the original story. We may have seen flashes of Leia’s tsundere tendencies with Han, but the original intent was to have Luke win Leia’s heart, but Harrison Ford’s on screen presence was much greater than that of Hamill’s, so that part of the story changed.

      Also, why does Obi-Wan lie to Luke about his father wanting to have his old lightsaber, given that Obi-Wan confiscated Anakin’s lightsaber after cutting off his limbs?

      8. Even calling for the forced improvisation of not having all of the ancient tools to properly teach Luke the Jedi Way, telling Luke that “Only a fully trained Jedi Knight, with the Force as his ally, will conquer Vader and His Emperor” is a bit of a stretch, seeing that the only one who “conquered” the Emperor was Mace Windu.

      The Empire Strikes Back is a movie that tugs at the heartstrings. It is a very popular movie even among casual moviegoers. But, like Star Trek’s The Voyage Home, the movie would set into motion events that would eventually submarine the franchise. The “I…am your father” sequence, for all of its impact, completely wrecked the story Lucas originally wanted, that’s why RotJ had to retcon the story and have Obi-Wan cover his own tracks about Anakin and Vader, among other issues.

      You may be comfortable with unforced errors. But many of your reasons are poor justifications as to why they need to exist.

  3. 1.) For all we know Vader may well have told the others; we didn’t see it but it could have happened. The fact that he says “you have failed me for the last time” implies that Ozzel has made mistakes before and the Vader has decided that enough is enough.
    The Rebels are a guerrilla movement and most guerrilla movements have to rely on whatever they can get their hands on. It is quite possible that they knew the weapons were crap but simply settled for what they could get.

    3.) Leia: She didn’t now Tarkin would fire on the planet. She was in a rock and a hard place so she tried to find a third way out. She was genuinely surprised that he did it and honestly I don’t blame her. The dialogue tar kin tells her about needing (a more effective demonstration) implies that he blew it up killing billions purely to show off his new toy. That is the most petty venal and horrible thing you can possibly do. Given Tarkin’s sadism he would have blown her planet up anyway, even if she had told him earlier (dantooine being to remote meant. She didn’t no this so she tried a third option. IT’s very possible that she was genuinely convinced tar kin wouldn’t be so ruthless as to fire on a populated planet to show that he had a massive penis. She did not deliberately sell out her planet. Also, she had a legit reason; if she told the truth the evil fascists would have won and everyone would be miserable. She had understandable reasons for keeping mouth shut.
    What is more, once Vader kept altering the deal Lando must have figured out that Vader had no intention of arguing. And while Vader may have had legitimate reasons for doing so he still betrayed and hurt them. They were fucked over BADLY and even if the guy had legit reasons you’re still going to be pissed. It’s irrational, but it’s human nature nonetheless.

    7.) The implication I got was that to an extent Obi Wan and Yoda were lying to themselves. If you think about it they did fuck up. a 25000 year old civilization and the order you cherished your whole life is annihilated in large part because you allowed yourself to grow arrogant and complacent, and gave the chosen one horrible advice (If Anakin had expressed his emotions constructively, than he would probably not have fallen.)

    There is actually a scene in the novelization where Yoda realizes that the reason the Jedi fell was because they clung blindly to the past rather than adapting and changing to the times.

    8.) With Mace their is actually a debate over who won, and Mace was a full Jedi Master (so he would qualify.)

    I’d say more but I have to go. I’ll continue later

    • Heavy Armor says:

      First, Vader never told Ozell. If he did, then Vader would not have called him “As clumsy as he is stupid.” He would have also not told him that he “failed.”

      Second, Leia has dealt with both Tarkin and Vader before. In fact, Tarkin had recently signed a Termination Order (better known as a Death Warrant) on Leia while she was in Vader’s custody. Also, the Death Star was nowhere near Alderaan when she was brought on board; it was not until Vader’s use of the Mind Probe wielded nothing (and he never considers the use of his Force Tricks) that Tarkin sends the Death Star to Alderaan. If Leia had no idea that proto-fascist killers like Tarkin and Vader were willing to kill the inhabitants of her home even after they intended to kill her, then she is an even biggest fool than Ozell. His incompetence merely cost the Empire his own life; Leia’s cost millions.

      As far as Lando is concerned, the deal that he made with Vader originally was probably that Han would be remanded to the custody of either Him (Lando) or the Empire, and any “accomplices” would be free to leave. But, lying in the backdrop is the fact that Vader had a full garrison of troops already in the city, and Vader is known for killing people at the drop of his whim. Your praise of obstinance in the face of mass death is not heroic.

      Also, I do find it interesting that you believe that Leia, having dealt with Vader AND Tarkin before, would not have known that they would be ruthless, but yet Lando, whom has never dealt with Vader directly EVER, should have known that Vader was not acting in good faith on any level. That must be some standard to have.

      Next, if the Green Muppet and the Ghost could not face their own arrogance and own up to it, then they have no right to tell others to do so. But, then again, this is no different from practitioners of American Born-Again Christianity: The Bell Tolls For Thee, But Not For Me – Or…Do As I Say, Not As I Do. It also happens to be an Order that I would not want to be a part of, either.

      Finally, I think you missed the point I was trying to make with regards to Mace and the Emperor: A number of “fully-trained” Jedi Knights accompanied Mace in attempting to arrest Emperor Palpatine…and they were all killed in short order. Jedi Master Yoda himself was defeated by Palpatine. Obi-Wan did defeat Anakin/Darth Vader. Twice, in fact. The second time, Obi-Wan tanked the match to become the Edgar Allan Poe Raven. But Obi-Wan was a Jedi Master at the time. Which was the point I was making; Lucas lost sight of the story after A New Hope did so well, and this is the end result – one of many.

      • Rob Parker says:

        You are forgetting that Leia folded when threatened with the destruction of her homeworld, the empire changed the deal and decided to blow up alderaan anyway in order to demonstrate the power of the death star. Tarkin talks about demonstrating its power earlier in the movie. There was nothing Leia could have done.

      • Heavy Armor says:

        I covered the why with Leia in the comment you replied to.

        Leia was captured by Vader AND tortured with The Dreaded Floating Ball of Interrogation (with additional Useless Syringe attachment) long before Tarkin decides to threaten Leia with The Planet Killer. Watch the conversation Vader has with Tarkin about Leia’s resistance to the Mind Probe again – because that’s where Vader’s stage 2 torture begins when he cannot find any clues as to where the Rebel’s base is on Senator Organa’s captured ship.

        But my ultimate point is that Leia’s actions are never scrutinized to the degree that I did in this post. Lando Calrissian, however, is considered to have “betrayed” his friends, despite the fact that the Empire had already landed hundreds of Stormtroopers on Bespin, BEFORE Han and Leia arrive, and they were being led by Lord Ruthless himself. And Lando has to counterbalance Han’s well-being with the lives of EVERYONE on Bespin. Yet, he manages to keep the people at Bespin alive, help Leia, Chewbacca, Luke, and the Droids to escape…

        …but he’s the traitor. But just about everyone who stoically and heroically stood up to the Dark Lord of the Sith until then…died.

        Lando avoids that by using some common and uncommon sense.

      • Once vader kept changing the deal it should have realized vader had no intention of keeping his word. Also there are shades of evil. Leia probably guessed he was evil enough to fire if she didn’t talk. Firing anyway purely to show off your weapons piwer regardless of gain is far more evil and leia may not have expected him to be THAT evil. Also if someone has logical reasons for betraying someone………you seriously think the people be betrayed are magically going to forgive him? Also ozel could have decided that his own plan was better and deviated. Because he was an egomaniac any warning of “sir the rebel shields are raised” would have gone in one ear and out the other.

      • Heavy Armor says:

        First of all, what ‘betrayal’ did Lando commit?

        And, whom did Lando ‘betray’?

        Here is a simple exercise for you.

        Outline a scenario in which:

        1. Lando does not ‘betray’ Han; AND

        2. Vader does not kill Lando outright BEFORE Han lands on Bespin; OR

        3. Vader does not kill the people on Bespin BEFORE Han lands; OR

        4. Vader does not kill the people on Bespin AFTER Han lands; OR

        5. Han can escape in a damaged Falcon WITHOUT being captured by Vader’s ship; OR

        6. Han can escape in a loaned ship WITHOUT being captured by Vader’s ship; OR

        7. Han can escape in a loaned ship WITHOUT being captured by Boba Fett’s ship; OR

        8. Han can escape BEFORE being captured by the large garrison of Stormtroopers ALREADY on Bespin;

        As for the rest, Leia was onboard the battlestation of which she stole the plans for. You do not name something “Death Star” if all it does is float in space. She was also made aware that Tarkin was going to have her killed (she even snarks at him about signing it himself). And you’re saying that Leia is not smart enough to believe that Tarkin nor Vader would be evil enough to use a Planet Killer to Kill a Planet?

        The idiocy of the Rebellion is only matched by the lunacy of the Empire.

  4. Okay, while I respect that you took time to build a case, your arguments rely a great deal on a misunderstanding of basic human nature.

    1.) They asked him for help in repairing their ship and giving them shelter. He pretended to do so, than gave them over to the empire. It’s like if a family in Germany tells a jewish family “we’ll keep you safe” and than promptly hands them over to the nazis. Even if he was under duress he still lied, claimed to help them, and than promptly handed them over to the people who were hunting them.
    2.) a.) 1 2 and 3 are important for vader’s plan, and han is desperate for whatever help he can get.
    b.) Vader needs Lando to cooperate. Once han was away he probably did plan to massacre them all anyway.
    c.) hyperdrive is to badly damaged
    d.) The falcon is to important to han and yes people can be that foolish about their cars or starships.
    e.) Han doesn’t know.

    Also, you are ignoring that there are varying degrees of evil. Blowing up a planet to wipe out the rebel base? Leia seemed perfectly aware that they’d do that, hence why she lied. The thing with alderaan was
    1.) It was full of their own citizens, and other than her father and high ranking government officials It’s highly possible that many were not actively plotting against the empire (since hatred alone is not enough to get people into dangerous situations where they risk their lives. Even in WW2 many french who weren’t necessarily fond of the nazis did not join the free french.)
    2.) Leia had just successfully fed them the location of a false rebel base. Leia probably thought that their plan now was to change their focus to wiping out the rebel base. A tactical thing to do would be to simply wait until they executed her, since by the time they realized she had given false intel they could never punish her. And while you could make the case as to it being short sighted, she was under duress and people can make short sighted decisions in duress.
    3.) There is a difference between “blowing up a planet where there rebellion hq is and thereby crushing all resistance” and “blowing up a prominent planet home to mostly unarmed civilians just to wave your dick around”. In avatar the last airbender the cast is well aware that the big bad Fire Lord Ozai is a heartless monster who plans to harness untold power, but even they are horrified when they learn he plans to use it to burn large parts of a continent home to more than 50% of the earth’s population to the ground to wipe out resistance.

    Theoretically the empire could just show everyone a holorecording of the rebel base homeworld blowing up, and that would be enough for most people. Blowing up a world of civilians when YOU ALREADY HAVE THE REBEL BASE (or think they do) could qualify as an “I knew you were monstrous but not THAT monstrous.”

    Also, why build nuclear weapons if we don’t intend to use them? While one could make the case that “ in our world is flawed, but in star wars world the empire is the only one with a death star. They can say with a straight face “if you oppose us you will all die.” Once they use it to wipe out the rebellion people will theoretically fall into line and never rise up for fear of being annihilated. Tarkin says that “Fear will keep the people in line. Fear of this battle station.”

  5. [“It is true that Lando’s actions are perfectly rational given his responsibilities as the administrator of Cloud City, even if they are morally questionable. His mistake is not anticipating Vader’s double-cross. Leia’s decision not to save her planet in “A New Hope” is the epitome of heroic. Remember that she does not in fact give away the location of the current rebel base on Yavin, instead giving the location of one on another planet that has been abandoned. The Rebel Allience is the only means of resistance against The Empire, and it is commendable that Leia puts her personal feelings aside for a noble. Remember that Star Wars takes place in a galaxy of trillions, perhaps more. Sacrificing one’s own planet to save many is the essence of heroism. It is what her adoptive father, one of the founders of the Rebel Alliance, would want.”]

    This doesn’t make any sense to me, whatsoever. Are you really trying to claim that Lando was wrong to betray Han? I would have done it. Unlike Leia, Lando was not a member of the Rebel Alliance. Regardless of whether he was making a profit or not, he was leader of the mining colony. And when you consider that Han had stupidly endangered Lando and the citizens of Bespin by unintentionally leading the Empire to Lando’s doorstep, because he was too cocky to realize that Boba Fett was following him, I really don’t see the need why Lando should have refrained from betraying him. Why on earth should he choose Han over the mining colony? And I wouldn’t be stupid enough to betray a Sith Lord, while he was maintaining a close eye on me..

  6. “The Galactic Empire as run by Darth Vader is no real threat. Darth spends far too much of his time berating his own people, when he’s not choking them to death for not reading his thoughts.” Yes, this IS true, but Hitler, Stalin and a host of other lunatics also spent most of their time destroying their own for failing to be psychic, but we’d hardly call them “no real threat”. Empires have a lot of stupidity inertia to burn through, killing millions on the way before they finally, mercifully run out of steam.

  7. drush76 says:

    “Leah doesn’t “have” Chewbacca choke Lando. He does that of his own accord. And she understandably tolerates it for a few seconds seeing as Lando just betrayed her and her friends. It would have been irrational if she allowed Chewbacca to murder Lando, but instead she calls him off, knowing that he is their only way out. I fail to see your problem with this scene.”

    Leia didn’t come to her senses on her own. It was Lando, who insisted that he knew where Han and Fett were, along with Threepio, who had protested against Chewie’s murder attempt.

    And although Chewie was the one who attacked Lando, Leia encouraged it. Worse, none of them had the good sense to realize the situation that Lando found himself in . . . and that they were partially responsible. Especially Han. To this day, I’m surprised that Lando never went into rant mode against Han for inadvertently leading Boba Fett, Vader and the Empire to his doorstep.

  8. drush76 says:

    [“As the administrator of Cloud City, Lando could have easily warned the heroes and provided them passage off world.”]

    And the majority of Bespin’s citizens would have been dead. You forgot to add that. But I keep forgetting. As far as most “STAR WARS” fans are concerned, Lando should have behaved like a proper “sidekick” . . . thinking of Han more than anyone else.

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